I think you should go back to the old photograph that appeared next to your column. The new one isn’t nearly as flattering as the old one. You look like a cross between Matt Drudge and Christina Aguilera. Sorry, but I calls ‘em like I sees ‘em.
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Cat: I’ve been reading your column ever since it first started appearing in the Post-Gazette. You rock! Just wanted to ask what was up with the new picture—I loved the old one!!! My Call: Don’t mess with a good thing. Bring back the original pic!
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Hi Cat,
Still enjoying the column even on a new day but what the heck did they do with the picture? Taking your picture away was not very nice. Keep up the good advice and take care.
Just read your article about being single. Yeah!!! You’re single, too! I KNEW there were still great ones out there.
Dear Cat,
Re: Dating Out Of Desperation
I dated a guy out of boredom. I dated a guy who cheated. I dated a guy with broken-fingers-dialing-syndrome, and a guy who is a mama’s boy. However, I haven’t dated a guy with an angry ex. Thanks for the suggestion!
Sincerely, Desperate Dater in DC
Re: Was I Snubbed?
Dear Cat,
I was perusing my papers that I hadnât read while on vacation and came across the answer you gave to âWas I snubbed.â This girl met a guy at a barâ¦they hit it offâ¦kissed a lot at the end of the nightâ¦Left to go get a bite to eatâ¦The guy didnât âofferâ to pay for her meal or take her homeâ¦So your answer was to toss himâ¦Let me get this straight. She didnât benefit from the kisses? Why didnât she offer to pay for his meal? Maybe she was looking to score! This answer was very one sided. I felt you were way off. To me they had fun that was that. If the girl was looking for a relationship I sure hope it doesnât start off in a bar with lots of kissing!
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Dear Cat,
As a female (former Pittsburgher, now living in Manhattan), I think everyone should pay for their own stuff when they meet at the bar. I don’t want to feel obligated to talk to a man just because he pulled out his wallet and bought me a glass of merlot. Guess what? I might want to talk to someone else, but in order to not seem rude, I would be stuck talking to Mr. Bigbucks. No thanks.
In NYC it’s pretty common practice that on a first date (let’s assume it’s dinner in a mid-priced restaurant), the woman offers to pay her part, and has the cash on her to do so. But when the guy says “No, my treat” she lets it go, thinking “Classy guy.” Sorry guys, but if you ask a woman out to dinner and then let her pay half, the clock is ticking on the remaining amount of time you have in her life. Also, ladies, if he does let you chip in, it’s a pretty fair sign that he’s probably not interested in you. Or cheap.
Often when then man says he’s picking up the check, it’s nice for the woman to offer to cover the tip, and the guy should let her do that much. Still, the lady’s going to be very impressed if you pay the whole bill. Sorry guys. That perfume we wear that you like so much? It’s $80+ a bottle. A tube of mascara can cost $15. Foundation? $40. Trust me, we’re feeling the pinch too, ok?
And to the woman who wrote in with the original question: If you want to be treated like a lady, try acting like one and save the tonsil hockey till you know the guy better.
Signed, A Reader in Manhattan
Re: Wankers
Cat,
I would love to know why, in your response to the letter from Not Kids Yet, you chose to call her friends masturbators? Perhaps before you toss around terms such as “wanker”, you should find out what they mean, as I am certain that many readers were as shocked as I was to see such a thing.
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Dear Cat,
You wrote: “DEAR NKY: Your friends are wankers for: a) saying you deserve loneliness; and b) not discerning the difference between “eligible” and “right for you.” Do you know the definition of “wanker”? If you do, shame on you. If you do not, look it up in the dictionary and from now on I would suggest that you not use terms if you are not entirely certain as to what they mean.
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Dear Cat,
I have just finished reading you in the Post Gazette and was amazed to read that you would call someone “wanker”. I can see reading that in Playboy or Penthouse but not in “one of America’s great newspapers”. In case you didn’t know “wanker” is the British slang word for a masturbator – and “to wank” is to jack-off. So to me and many other readers you have written “Your friends are jack-offs”. Next time to intend to use British slang, send me an E mail and I’ll translate it into American english for you. PS never use “shag”
Dear Cat:
I applaud your call that repeating a mispronounced word will only perpetuate its misuse. And I think your approach to handling someone else’s mispronunciation is sensible and courteous.
I’m reminded of a story I read—I believe in a long-ago Reader’s Digest. I doubt that it’s true, but I thought it was marvelously funny. It seems the late Queen Mary of England (the present Queen’s grandmother) was visiting wounded soldiers in a hospital during WWI. She was hearing the story of a man who had seen action at Ypres, France. “”Well, Your Majesty,” he said, “there we was at Wipers…” The Queen interrupted him and said, “Ee-per.” He went on, “well, like I was saying, we was fighting at Wipers…” and the Queen again corrected him: “Ee-per.” This happened several times before she moved on down to the next man. After she had left, someone asked him what he thought of the Queen. “Well, she’s a right fine lady,” he said. “Too bad she had the hiccups.”
Signed, A faithful reader ( We do not stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing… George Bernard Shaw )
Hi Cat,
I just read your column and wondered if you were a lot of talk. What are you doing this evening? I’m busy, as the cliche goes, but could be unbusy for a woman who writes with such wisdom and verve. Iâm in my sixties and don’t date women more than ten years younger but would make an exception for a woman who could also “walk that walk”. (That’s two cliches in one missive. I must be getting close to the limit.) Anyway, purr on, Sweet Sister!
Dear Cat,
Great article on singles!!!!!!!!! Very succinct and playful without bashing us over the head.
Re: Dog Man
Cat, I am a 50 year old man and I love cats. I like dogs too, but cats rule. I always taught my 2 girls that they should never date a man who hates cats. He hates them because he cannot control them. He will treat his women the same!! Girls, give all your dates a “cat scan.”
Hi I don’t normally write to these columns but this one caught my attention. I was also a heavy set woman at one point. It is all about looks with people. I have been told since I was a small child that I have such a pretty face except that I was fat. Now that I’ve lost the weight I still hear that I’m a great person but I have yet to meet someone. He will find someone but it takes a lot of work.
